ST. JOHN – St. John the Evangelist is helping couples build a stronger marriage through Alpha Marriage.
The marriage course has been successfully run in over 117 countries worldwide since it was created by Nicky and Sila Lee, authors of The Marriage Book. The program, designed for couples who are married or have lived together for more than two years, is currently underway at SJE.
Human Resources Coordinator Kris Ziegelhofer explained SJE is an Alpha hub parish and runs the program, two sessions per year, with an estimated 200 people. So, when Alpha presented Alpha Marriage to parish staff, they were immediately interested.
“Father (Sammie) Maletta does a lot of counseling with married couples, and we knew we needed to be doing more to minister to married couples,” she said.
SJE applied for and received a grant from the Diocese of Gary in the summer of 2023 to run a pilot program. Ziegelhofer and her husband were in the pilot program along with eight other couples.
“Everyone recommended moving forward with the program,” she said. “We offered another session for 50 couples last summer, and the response was overwhelmingly positive.”
Ziegelhofer stated the videos and workbook for the program really help to open up communication and allow couples to go deeper into a variety of topics.
“I think they walk away with better tools to communicate with one another and a better understanding of their spouses,” she said. “Topics include things like how your family of origin impacts your marriage and conflict styles.”
Josh Schultz is the pastoral associate of relational ministry and runs the parish’s Alpha, Alpha Marriage and Rescue Project programs. Alpha Marriage started July 7, and Schultz said the first evenings have gone well.
Speaking to his own experience and the need for the program, Schultz shared that he and his wife run the risk of their marriage becoming more task-oriented and business-like just like most couples.
“Meaghan and I often have to be mindful to prioritize our marriage as we go about our day-to-day routine,” he said. “We've gone on maybe three or four one-on-one dates so far this year. In speaking with friends, we’ve found that this is not uncommon.”
Alpha Marriage offers seven dates over seven weeks – a chance to reconnect. It provides catered meals, a beer and wine offering, music in the narthex, childcare and semi-private dining.
“While we know we’re in a church, we’ve tried to create as much of an ‘evening out’ atmosphere as possible,” Schultz said. “The atmosphere this past Monday was light, with much laughter heard throughout the narthex.”
The programming, he believes, is well done and added that it includes opportunities built into the video for reflection, both individually and as a couple. Each spouse has a journal/workbook for individual and joint reflection and sharing.
Schultz said he is grateful for the opportunity, through the Holy Spirit, to offer the marriage program to the community.
“Anecdotal reports from those who attended – over 40 couples – were very positive,” he said. “Pray that this continues into the next weeks and beyond!”
Khalil Hattar, pastoral associate for administration and chief of staff, said SJE recognized a need in the community to support couples in the everyday ups and downs of married life.
“After all, it's the primary vocation of most of our parish partners,” Hattar said. “Whether newly married or together for decades, every couple can benefit from intentional time to invest in their relationship.”
The Alpha Marriage course provides a space that’s both private and encouraging, where couples can discuss important topics without pressure and leave with practical tools and tips on how to deepen and strengthen their loving commitment to one another.
Having experienced the “fruit” of the Alpha course and as an Alpha Hub parish, Hattar stated the course aligns beautifully with the parish mission.
“It strengthens the domestic church – helping marriages thrive strengthens families, which strengthens the parish to be disciples who make disciples,” he said.
Hattar hopes couples engaged with the Alpha program gain a renewed sense of perspective and connection. Perspective, in that, they see themselves through the eyes of Christ and together rest their gaze, trust, and desires on Him. Connection, in that, they feel heard, valued, and encouraged – not just by the content and hospitality, but by the simple act of prioritizing each other for a few hours each week.
“The course is practical, grounded, and deeply relational,” Hattar said. “Having committed to the course, they should leave with better communication tools, a deeper understanding, and a sense that their marriage matters not just to each other, but to God and the Church.”
For more information on upcoming Alpha courses, visit stjohnparish.org/alpha or email jschultz@stjohnparish.org.
