Diocese of Gary

MERRILLVILLE – Young adults were invited to a special evening of community, faith, and formation on Aug. 21 as part of the events planned for the weekend of the Diocese of Gary’s Emmaus Conference.

As those 18-39 arrived at the Pastoral Center for “Hearts Burning: A Young Adult Evening,” they were welcomed and joined by a handful of diocesan clergy, including Bishop Robert J. McClory, Father Declan McNicholas, Father Terry Bennis and Father Ivan Alatorre.

Melissa Canelo, a summer intern with the Diocese of Gary, also greeted participants at a sign-in table as they entered. She shared that an estimated 75 registered to attend. Familiar with Indiana University in Bloomington and the FOCUS (Fellowship of Catholic University Students) group there that organized activities, she was happy to be a part of an event that likewise was geared toward young adults.

“I’m glad the Missionary Discipleship and Evangelization Office is doing something similar where it’s bringing all the young adults together, letting them get to know one another so we can keep lighting each other on fire (in faith),” she said.

Emily Ortiz, of Cedar Lake, who works for Franciscan Health, was invited by a woman religious, a member of the Sisters of St. Francis of Perpetual Adoration. She became further interested in coming when she learned the event was specifically for her age group.

“I've never really seen something for young adults at all,” she said. “It was either for older adults, or children but never anything in between, so I thought I'd like to give it a chance to see what it was about.”

Ortiz said it was nice to see that there are young people around her age who are devout in their faith and “have a similar path to you, because not everyone is, especially like my generation isn’t always knowledgeable or open about it.”

“At times, it can be kind of weird to talk about faith, but here you feel more comfortable,” Ortiz added.

Naomi Mendez, of Lake Station, attended some of the diocese’s young adult speaker series over the summer when she first learned of the special Friday night gathering added to the Emmaus Conference weekend for young adults. She wanted to attend to spend time with some friends and was intrigued by the topic for the evening – “Gender and the Theology of Your Body.”

“I’ve heard a lot about the St. Pope John Paul II teachings (on Theology of the Body) and thought that was interesting,” she said. “I think it’s something that not a lot of people talk about. I’ve noticed even as Catholics there’s a lot of ignorance between us about this topic.”

The evening featured Jason Evert, one of the keynote speakers of the Emmaus Conference. Evert earned a master’s degree in Theology, and undergraduate degrees in Counseling and Theology, with a minor in Philosophy at Franciscan University of Steubenville. He is a best-selling author of 20 books, including "Saint John Paul the Great," "How to Find Your Soulmate without Losing Your Soul" and "The Dating Blueprint."

Evert started his speech by noting that social media and even some forms present a variety of genders, including transgender, nonbinary and others. He asked those gathered to consider what it would be like to experience gender dysphoria and “assume the Church basically has nothing to offer you but condemnation and rejection, and you would be left feeling there's no place for me in the Church.”

So the question becomes, he stated, “How are we to respond to this?” He noted most people have friends, coworkers or even family that might identify as trans or nonbinary and also struggle with depression. He also acknowledged that perhaps there might be people in the room experiencing a gender disorder.

“What does God think about me?, and I think that answer, at least, is the easiest one. It’s here in the Old Testament, just laid out real clear, and says, ‘God, for you love all things that exist and you hate none of the things that you've made, because you wouldn't have made anything if you had hated it,'” he said, quoting from the Book of Wisdom.

Evert added, “God loves these individuals and (loves them) better than us,” he said. “And he knows (what) they're going through.”

Evert talked about a person he knows who is a Catholic male in his 30s who wrestles with gender dysphoria. That person, growing up, learned to cope, to be strong, to be normal, coupled with being autistic and not knowing that until he was 31. He never felt like he belonged anywhere. He told Evert, “I don't want to have surgery. I don't want to take hormones. I know that both of those will only present other problems. However, being a man is just not feeling authentic to me. I don't feel like I'm truly one of the guys. It feels like I'm mimicking the gorillas, so they don't realize that I'm not part of their group, but being a woman doesn't always work either because no matter what I do, I’m not truly one of them either.”

While Evert acknowledged he doesn’t truly know what that would be like and it's not something that he’s personally struggled with, he understands it's tremendously difficult for those who do. Evert suggested that individuals can still offer those dealing with these issues love while at the same time giving them the truth, basically charity at the same time as clarity.

Evert then distinguished the differences between gender theory and gender dysphoria. Reciting words from Pope Francis, he read, “Gender theory is an expression of frustration and resignation. It seeks to cancel out sexual differences because it no longer knows how to deal with it. We risk taking a step backwards. The removal of sexual differences creates a problem, not a solution.”

Evert said he believes society is trying to erase sexual distinctions, and people are then overreacting to overly rigid gender stereotypes within culture.

‘If you're a real woman, you should fit into this Instagram mold. And if you're a real man, you better be into drinking beer and shooting deer and watching NASCAR,” he said.

Evert stated he knows he is a man, not because of his actions, but because he has the body of a man: “and our bodies are not meaningless, they're meaningful.” He went on to cite Pope Francis again, “These rigid gender stereotypes hinder the development of an individual's abilities to the point of leading him or her to think that it's not really masculine to cultivate art or dance. It’s not very feminine to exercise leadership.”

Evert said these are bogus gender stereotypes, explaining that the most masculine man he ever met, who he got to see him in person 24 times, is a man who deeply loved theater, poetry and the arts – St. Pope John Paul II.

Because if you think about it, Evert said, gender stereotypes exaggerate sexual differences, but gender theory seeks to eliminate them altogether, and one’s sexual identity is given by God.

When a person is biologically one sex and has an internal sense of identity for the other, this disconnect creates tension and discomfort known as gender dysphoria. Evert said studies have shown that 80 percent or more of the time the dysphoria goes away when the child finishes puberty.  

Evert said transgender is the belief that “your feelings are not the problem. It's your body. That's the problem.” These feelings indicate that the only way to live an authentic life is to transition, which has multiple steps that include changing their name, outfits, etc., and then moving on to taking puberty blockers and hormone therapy. Evert said in some cases the individual receives these measures too young and can even be deceived into thinking the changes are reversible and have no side effects.

“I think these people deserve to hear the truth, but you know what? They also deserve to be listened to,” he said. “My challenge is that you would learn to listen to gender dysphoria with reverent curiosity because I think it's a road map towards their healing.”

Sam Thyen, of Valparaiso, attended the Emmaus Conference last year and enjoyed it, which prompted him to register this year. He felt the talk by Evert was really wonderful and relevant to situations going on in today’s society.

“I think, at least for Catholics like myself, he has a lot of answers to the places where we can get stuck when it comes to dealing with gender dysphoria and everything else.”

For more information about young adult ministries in the Diocese of Gary, visit https://www.garyoyya.org/yam/